


Astronauts

by romanfunkboy



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Downton Abbey, The Crown (TV)
Genre: Abusive Undertones, Autoerotic Asphyxiation, Crack Crossover, M/M, PWP, This Is Absolute Crack, This is crack, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:06:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23429689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romanfunkboy/pseuds/romanfunkboy
Summary: this is absolute crack ok this is crack this is weird i have no idea what possessed me to write this.
Relationships: Thomas Barrow/Antony Armstrong-Jones/Paul Prenter
Comments: 1
Kudos: 6





	Astronauts

**Author's Note:**

> Look we have Thomas, the scheming gay butler. then we have Antony, the abusive husband and then we have Paul, a literally gaslighting douchbag of a boyfriend im just saying when allen leech and matthew goode played those gay characters i literally imagined them with thomas barrow with some weird reason. i dont know but slap slap kiss relationships are hot to me but yes its abusive but ngl its hot. i didnt even read this through for spellchecks and i might ever rest my eyes on this cursed thing ever again. notes at the end for some fun facts about lube

"Oh, oh my god.”

Thomas was writhing between the two men pressed up against his back and front. He was walking down the abbey hallways when a hand shot out and jerked him backwards into a store closet. Immediately his neck was ravaged by a tall lanky man who looks bizarrely like Mr Talbot save for the blonde locks on his head. The look a like was clutching his face and kissing him impossibly deep, leaving Thomas gasping for breath. He broke away when he felt two arms wrap around his middle and looked down to see shiny leather. Confused, he turned his head around only to witness an even stranger sight, Tom Branson with the most peculiar haircut and even more peculiar moustache. “I don’t understand,” he stammers as ‘Tom’ starts to unbutton his trousers.

“Just relax now you beautiful delicious thing,” the blonde man smirked. “Paul and I will take good good care of you.”

Paul, Thomas inferred his name as such, as shoved his trousers and drawers down to his knees and is currently grinding his hard on between his bare cheeks. Thomas breathlessly watched as the blonde man started to stroke his dick, his hips jerking up into his fist. “W-who are you?”

The blonde smirked. “Call me Tony.”

Thomas felt something liquid and cold drip onto his hole and jumped. Paul’s arm tightened around his chest as his other hand started to spread the liquid around his hole and push in.

“Wow, what’s that?” Tony looked over Thomas’s shoulder and his eyes gleamed with delight. “Is that K-Y Jelly?”

“No, it’s called Astroglide. Made by astronauts.” Paul chuckled.

“Space men?” Tony exclaimed, intrigued.

Thomas has no idea what they were saying but Paul’s fingers were scissoring and pressing down on just the spot inside of him so he couldn’t care less if only Paul didn’t stop. He pushed down on those fingers and whined when Paul pulled out. Tony kissed him again and took a hold of both their cocks together in a loose fist. Then Thomas felt Paul push in and begin to pump his hips before he could get used to the stretch. He groaned in slight pain, tears stinging the corners of his eyes. Paul’s arms wrapped around his arms and torso, effectively trapping Thomas against his muscular chest impossibly tight and hard. Thomas struggled a little in alarm and he made to pull away from his kiss with Tony.

The blonde’s free hand shot and gripped Thomas’s neck and jaw hard, cutting off his airway. Thomas choked gasp was swallowed by Tony’s mouth as he sped up his fist around both of their cocks. Every trust by Paul shoved Thomas into Tony’s hand against his cock. His head was beginning to spin from the lack of air. His hips jerked once, twice and just before his orgasm hit him, Tony let go of his hand. Blood rushed upwards as his body shook from his climax and his muscles clenched down reflexively hard on Paul inside of him. Paul groaned and with a final hard thrust, came inside of Thomas. He pulled away and Thomas felt his seed drip between his thighs and down his legs. It was arousing and his cock gave a feeble twitch at the sensation. Tony stroked himself to completion, shooting his cum onto Thomas’s softening dick.

He merely glanced at his stained fingers and grinned deviously. Leaning forwards, he trailed his hand down between Thomas’s legs and began to finger Thomas with his cum as lubricant.

As Thomas’s breathing start to quicken again, he heard Paul whisper into his ear, “Ready for round 2?”

**Author's Note:**

> literally wanted some fun interactions to indicate they are from different eras and lube came up. KY jelly was good lube in the 1904 but it wasnt over the counter until like maybe ard 1965. so thomas would have used good old vaseline but antony would have gotten ky jelly. paul i assumed would have used astroglide in the 80s but i read Crisco is very popular for SM/gay dungeons but Paul pulling out a can of crisco is not as sexy in the fic lol


End file.
